we shared a history

we shared our history

day 62

we went to see toy story 3 with the boys over the holiday.
i audibly chocked down a sob when each toy reached out to the other and held hands inside the fire's embers, resolved to their lives' immediate end.

they're just toys, they're just toys, they're just toys.

i caught a glimpse of elliot's profile as the screen sparked to bright amber. i didn't recognize him. or i missed him. i'm not sure which. - the two feelings are one in the same. - i wrapped an arm around his chest, gripping his tiny shoulder in a protective gesture to fasten him to myself, anticipating the imminent pain of separation. he quickly squirmed, ducked his head under my arm and wiggled free from my grip.
as part of a new resolve to remain still, i dropped my shoulders, laid my head back and allowed the fires of separation to drown my body.
i know they aren't mine to keep.

eisley - ambulance